Always an Outcast

In school and growing up, I always felt like an outcast. I always felt like I never really belonged with any group, or even some people I just didn't feel I belonged around. Once I started being with guys, I seriously thought I had found my place. I seriously felt like my place was under a man.. Wow.. Writing that down made me sound so dumb.. Anyway, I still feel like an outcast, tho it's not because I want to be cool, or I want to fit in, I just haven't been around these people enough to "fit in" with them. I get along with them, love hanging out with them, but if it wasn't for work, I wouldn't know any of them.. So for now I just have to sit back and wait til my spot opens up.... If it ever does. But the difference between now and back then? It doesn't upset me now like it did so long ago. I understand that I'm not gonna be instant friends with anyone and become bff's and hang out every day, it's unrealistic, but getting along with them and having a good time at work is all I need. I get the interaction I want for 4hrs a day Monday thru Friday. And that's okay with me.